"Nightman, sneaky and mean; spider inside my dreams; you make me want to cry; y'all make me desire to dice; I love you; I beloved you"
"See, this is what I'1000 talking about. Illiteracy? What does that word even mean?"
--Charlie Kelly, "The Gang Gives Frank an Intervention"
Charlie Kelly'southward illiteracy is a major theme in Information technology's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.
Charlie ofttimes exhibits difficulty reading and writing, and is often accused of beingness illiterate or dyslexic by other characters. Mac even went as far every bit claiming "No one understands the subtleties of Charlie's retardation better than me." (The Gang Gets Held Earnest)
Season One[]
In "Charlie Has Cancer", Charlie is pretending to read a book inside the coffee shop while stalking The Waitress. The book is upside down.
Season Two[]
Charlie writes a script for a "jihad video" that The Gang wants to use to threaten Ari Frankel, merely Dennis refuses to read information technology, saying that it is "riddled with spelling errors," and speaks gibberish meant to sound similar Arabic instead. (The Gang Goes Jihad)
Charlie was unable to read his job listed on paper after blowing up a building (The Gang Goes Jihad), then he got Mac to read information technology for him. The words were "Interstate" and "sanitation". (The Gang Gives Back)
Charlie wrote an incoherent script for Dennis' TV commercial, causing Dennis to suspect Charlie is dyslexic: "Hello beau American. This you should vote me. I leave power. Good. Thanks, thank you. If y'all vote me, I'1000 hot. Taxes, they'll exist lower... son. The Autonomous vote is the right thing to do Philadelphia, and so do." (The Gang Runs for Function)
Charlie tin can not read a note left by Frank: Charlie: "Okay, run into... it starts out encounter... um"; Dennis: (takes note) "'Meet me in the parking garage. -Frank.' You conspicuously have a learning inability, dude". (The Gang Runs for Part)
Flavour Three[]
Charlie kidnapped a baby from Mac and Dee, and leftthis note: "Taked Baby. Meet at later bar. Night or day sometime." (The Gang Finds a Dumpster Baby)
Charlie had Ernesto read Dee's center school diary out loud to him. (Dennis and Dee's Mom Is Dead)
Charlie wrote a note in the vents that Frank read: "If here past at present then bad identify be. Problem fourth dimension for y'all when heat comes." (The Gang Gets Held Hostage)
Charlie misread a door marked "PRIVATE" every bit proverb, "PIRATE". (The Gang Solves the N Korea Situation)
Charlie doesn't empathise what the give-and-take "wooed" means, and repeatedly takes it to mean "wood". (The Gang Sells Out)
Charlie left a tape with incriminating evidence in front of Urban center Hall labeled "4 THE MARE". (Bums: Making a Mess All Over the City)
Charlie misread a contract that resulted in his putting the bar at adventure of beingness lost in a contest, misreading the word PRIZE as PRIDE. (The Gang Dances Their Asses Off)
Flavor Four[]
Charlie wrote a sign to help sell the Gang'southward gasoline. His sign gave prices for "UИLED'D", "PREMEM" and "DEASEL". (The Gang Solves the Gas Crisis)
For some reason, Charlie is familiar with the give-and-take "disintegrated" ("Mac and Charlie Dice (Part ane)").
In the "list of demands" that Charlie and Mac leave in lieu of a last volition and testament, Charlie demands that "[his] ashes are to be fabricated into a tea and dranken by every wan in bar." ("Mac and Charlie Die (Part 1)")
Charlie has a stalking notebook, where he keeps all the Waitress' "whereabouts". For some reason, Dee was able to read it (afterwards she stole information technology) - but Charlie has backups for it. ("Who Pooped the Bed?")
Some fans accept suggested that Charlie'southward freakout over Pepe Silvia might exist due to him not being able to read the word "Pennsylvania". Nonetheless, Mac points out to Charlie in the episode, "Not simply practise all of these people exist, but they have been asking for their mail on a daily basis!". Additionally, staff writer Scott Marder was asked directly and denied the theory.
Charlie was unable to write articulate lyrics to his musical, and needed assist from Artemis: Charlie: "She also transcribed my work into a format you might observe more legible."; Dee: "Or literate, she added words to it."(The Nightman Cometh)
Season V[]
Kitten Mittons
When Charlie tries to fence with The Lawyer nigh contract law, The Lawyer remarks that not only does Charlie not know anything about the law, "It seems like y'all take a tenuous grasp on the English language in general." Charlie responds to this by proverb "Filibuster," but cannot tell The Lawyer what that word ways when The Lawyer asks Charlie to ascertain it for him. (The Gang Exploits the Mortgage Crisis)
Charlie turned on the Closed sign in forepart of the bar every morning time, because he believed it says COORS. (The Great Recession)
Charlie does not know the meaning of the word "illiteracy". Later in that same episode, Dee asks a therapist to requite Charlie an intervention "because he'due south totally illiterate" -- Charlie denies that he can't read or write, he says he just doesn't like to. (The Gang Gives Frank an Intervention)
In a somewhat surprising moment of literacy, Charlie manages to write a perfectly formed "H" on a box he has put a hornet's nest into, even though he is writing on the side of the box facing away from him, forcing him to write backwards and upside down in relation to him (It should exist noted that writing a H "backwards and upside down" is the same as writing a regular H). (It's also a bit hitting that he knows that the give-and-take "hornet" begins with an "H".) In that aforementioned episode, however, his difficulty with language raises its head once again, equally he cannot empathise the give-and-take "philanthropist" and ends upwards telling his date that he is a "full-on rapist." His caption is that the word "gets blocked up in [his] oral cavity and don't say it no skilful". (The Waitress is Getting Married)
Charlie'south Kitten Mittens commercial was entitled KITTEN MITTONS. Afterwards, after trying to speak "lawyer talk", he grabs his lapels and says he'southward made himself "perfectly redundant", something The Lawyer is eager to hold with. (Paddy's Pub: Domicile of the Original Kitten Mittens)
Charlie was unable to read a carnival sign in front end of the Waitress that said, "SpeedPitch: HOW FAST Tin can YOU THROW?" (The D.E.Northward.N.I.South. System)
Season Half-dozen[]
Charlie tries to search the Internet for the word "hockey" but insists that the keyboard has no "H" key. (Mac's Big Break). It should also exist noted that the question he is attempting to find the answer for in no way contains the discussion hockey, and is simply related to information technology.
Charlie has typed the Waitress in his mobile'south memory every bit "Wicksox" or something. He was ashamed before Mac, so he blamed a "smart type" of his phone by saying "it tries to complete the give-and-take for y'all". (Deleted Scene for Mac and Charlie: White Trash)
Charlie's book, which contains all his "dreams and aspirations" (which are mostly in pictures and symbols), entitled as "Dram bach" - this should represent "Dream book". (Charlie Kelly: King of the Rats)
Flavour Seven[]
Charlie barfs a bunch of fake blood on his date (which was a prepare upward to actually end upwards being Frank's date) in the back of the limo that Frank is driving. Even though information technology ought to be obvious that you shouldn't ingest the capsules, let alone "eat a agglomeration of blood 'capslets'", every bit Charlie and so claims to have done earlier, Charlie wouldn't have been able to coherently read whatever alarm on the packaging due to his illiteracy. He too claims to accept a "touch of consumption", though is able to accurately use the give-and-take "constituent". (Frank'south Pretty Adult female)
The question that Charlie wrote for Chardee MacDennis reads as follows: "Dennis is asshole. Why Charlie detest?" (the answer existence, of course, "Because Dennis is a bounder human.") Charlie denies that he wrote it, but Mac says it has to be him, because "How many illiterates are there here?" Equally shortly as Dennis answers, Charlie remembers that he wrote the card. (Chardee MacDennis: The Game of Games)
Probably, information technology was written something like this :
Denis is ashole. Y Charlee chapeau? (Becauze Denis is a bastardt human being!)
Season Eight[]
08x04
Charlie misread a door marked "Brett DeLawter, A Dental Corporation" as "Brett DeLawyer, A Denial Correlation". Mac remarks that, though he didn't go it all right, this was pretty good for Charlie, showing that he might exist working on reducing his illiteracy. (Pop-Pop: The Final Solution)
Charlie keeps a listing of things that he regularly does for The Waitress: for example, he watches her cycle so it doesn't get stolen (and barks at every "suspicious" person like a canis familiaris), puts vitamins in her shampoo and then her hair doesn't fall out, and tests her nutrient then it doesn't go poisoned - of course, information technology'due south all in weird paintings. For some reason, Dennis is aware nearly that. When Frank tries to apply the listing to do tasks for The Waitress that Charlie was doing, he misreads information technology (understandably) and does the tasks incorrectly: for example, he thinks it says that he should put rat poison in her shampoo. (Charlie and Dee Discover Beloved)
Hither'southward a role of Bonnie Kelly's speech from her cancer fundraiser that Charlie wrote: "Requite me money. Money me. Money at present. Me a money needing a lot now." (Charlie's Mom Has Cancer)
When Frank takes on Charlie as his "correct-hand human being" for his return to the company he founded, both Mac and Dennis land that Charlie cannot read. However, Charlie does really evidence at least somewhat competent at the job, every bit he is able to keep rails of Frank's busy schedule, apparently writing it down in an appointment book (presumably in the aforementioned mixture of drawings and fractured phrases he has used before.) (Frank'southward Back in Business)
Charlie wants to know who he'll be "persecuting" (instead of prosecuting) in the trial. He immediately follows up Dee's remark on this mistake with the word "irregardless," which does not exist. Some other bespeak in the episode that demonstrates Charlie's minimal grasp of the English linguistic communication is when he replaces the words "distinguished colleagues" with "distinguished collies. (Reynolds vs. Reynolds: The Cereal Defense force)
Flavor Ix[]
In an blithe fantasy of his life with The Waitress, Charlie teaches the many children he and The Waitress have had the game Nighttime Crawlers with a chart labeled "NITE KROLLER RULEZ" (The Gang Saves the Day)
When he is given a placebo smart pill, Charlie begins displaying a startlingly heightened intelligence, due to his admission to sound books. Dennis remarks that "any idiot" can listen to a book, but is close downwards when Charlie accurately describes the placebo upshot. He can understand Shakespeare's opinion on brevity, speak much more articulately, and plain has taken up speaking Standard mandarin. Still, by the end of the episode, it's exposed that most of Charlie's intelligence was either forgotten or made upward: He'south been speaking gibberish, believes he's invented a way for "Spydars" to talk to cats, and forgets how to say "Placebo", a give-and-take he accurately used a day before. His mathematical equations shown are "4 + 4= 17 %" and "Ten = 9 + 9 = box (that's where the cat goes)". (Flowers for Charlie)
Season 10[]
Charlie plainly does not recognize cursive writing as writing, referring to it as "weird squiggly lines." (Mac Kills His Dad)
Charlie takes the survey to provide answers for the game testify "Family Fight", including one that reveals his difficulty with agreement the meaning of words: he provides the answer "Bride" for the question "Name something people groom themselves with, because "you lot tin't become a groom, or be groomed, without a bride." (The Gang Goes on Family unit Fight)
Information technology's pointed out that Charlie signed "Paddy's Succession Plan" as what appears to exist "Chrundle." Charlie claims "I was going by Chrundle at the time," but Mac says he was just trying to write "Charlie" and failing. (Frank Retires)
Flavour Eleven[]
Charlie reads Brazil's name off a globe as "Bray-zee-al". (Chardee MacDennis 2: Electric Boogaloo)
When interviewing potential roommates with Mac, Charlie is wearing his reading glasses, but whatever time he puts pen to newspaper, he just makes scribbling motions. Equally information technology turns out, he'due south simply drawing cans of cat food to determine how suitable each candidate is. (Frank Falls Out the Window)
Mac describes Charlie as an "illiterate janitor" to an art gallery owner that they want to hold an exhibit of Charlie's artwork. (Dee Made a Smut Film)
Season Twelve[]
Charlie expresses a bully deal of defoliation trying to read a map, proverb he's not sure how to notice n on information technology; he believes north is wherever up is. He is further confused when Frank explains that north is on the top of the map. (The Gang Goes to a Water Park)
Charlie receives a alphabetic character made upwards of symbols and drawings from his mother, resembling some of the "writing" he's done in episodes like The Nightman Cometh, which suggests that she knows how to "write" in a way he tin understand (though he withal manages to misunderstand the note he's sent). When he watches the sitcom that Dennis has assembled out of surveillance footage of his mom and Mac's mom, Charlie says "It'south cool how the letters fly on the screen", not recognizing the messages as credits. (Old Lady House: A Situation One-act)
Charlie does not recognize the name Channing Tatum, and believes Dee is saying "a mannerly taint human". (PTSDee)
While writing a Valentine's Carte for Frank'south tapeworm Jerry, Charlie struggles a bully bargain with writing the bulletin and rhyming. When allowable by Dee under the threat of anthrax to sing her a Valentine's song, he is unable to rhyme simple words (such equally rhyming "Dee" with "Beetle" or "I"). (The Gang Tends Bar)
On ane of the graphs Charlie has fabricated upwardly for the Waitress, he has written "Work" in very crude uneven letters, with a backwards "R". He also says "Rio de Janeiro" equally "Rio de Juh-diro".(Dennis' Double Life)
Season Thirteen[]
Charlie is shown using his new smartphone upside downward at least once. He likewise gets nervous that people volition exist confused by the phrase "Liberal Tears". (The Gang Makes Paddy'southward Swell Once more)
Equally The Gang closes Paddy'south Pub to go to the Super Bowl, Charlie posts the following sign: "CLOZED 4 SALMONELLA BECOZ SOOPER BOL". ("Closed for salmonella, because of [the] Super Bowl.") Dee has the following reaction: "How is information technology that 'salmonella' is the simply word you spelled correct?" His map of the bar and its traps is similarly illegible. (Charlie'due south Dwelling Alone)
Season Fourteen[]
Charlie thinks that the give thanks-you note on the present Alexi and Nikki leave them is written in "Austrian", but Frank points out that it's in English. (The Gang Gets Romantic)
Charlie is shown to be the nearly efficient at communicating through, and agreement, the Gang's group chat through employ of emojis to represent words. His text to Dee asking if she is alone, even so, reads "U A LON! WHERE GAGN... U A LON?!?!?!?" Dennis likewise mentions that Charlie cannot read during an argument with Mac. (The Gang Texts)
Charlie's listing of people who may have a problem with Frank, written in crude semi-legible letters (The Janitor Always Mops Twice):
Huh-wang
The Waytur
Pon D
Arr Temis
Lee Am Mik Poyl
Ben The Soulja
Unkle Jax
Gail 🐌
Z
Rex
Fish Factory Asians
Flavour Fifteen[]
Charlie struggles immensely remembering his lines as Riggs, probable due to misreading the script. (The Gang Makes Lethal Weapon 7)
Charlie repeatedly gets measurements of currency incorrect; assertive a wad of $4,000 to be "at least $eighty", enthusiastically comparison ane quarter to $9,000, and subsequently beingness convinced with ease that his $57,000 would buy him equally much shares in the bar as Mac's $4,000 and Dennis' $v,000. (The Gang Buys a Roller Rink)
Charlie'south written respond to Dennis' question of vacation destinations is "Yello" in childish handwriting. Dennis believes he meant to write "Yellowstone" simply Charlie clarifies he did hateful xanthous as in the colour. (The Gang Replaces Dee With a Monkey)
Information technology is discovered that Charlie is capable of reading and writing the Gaelic language. (The Gang Goes to Ireland). He believes that he cannot speak information technology, just when he meets Shelly Kelly (who turns out to be his father), he also speaks it with him. He as well misidentifies the word "monger" for "mongrel" and "monster". (The Gang's Still in Ireland)
Charlie asks Shelly about the gravestone of "Michael Kelly", which Shelly reads to him. (Dee Sinks in a Bog)
Notes[]
Charlie has repeatedly written the letter of the alphabet "N" backwards. (The Gang Solves the Gas Crisis, The Nightman Cometh)
Quotes[]
Charlie: You got that script I wrote? Catch that script.
Dennis: I've been meaning to speak to you most this. I can't read these words. They're non in the right lodge.
Charlie: It's good.
Dennis: I think yous might be dyslexic bro. I'm not reading this.
Charlie: No, no, no, no!
Dennis: I call up y'all might be dyslexic.
Charlie: Just read it one time!
Dennis: Ok... y'all want me to read the script?
Charlie: Yes... and activity!
Dennis: I'll read the words you wrote. "Hi fellow American. This you should vote me. I leave power. Good. Cheers, thanks. If you vote me, I'm hot." What? "Taxes, they'll be lower... son. The Autonomous vote for me is right affair to do Philadelphia, and so do." This doesn't brand whatsoever sense!
Charlie: Alright... and so simply say whatsoever you want.
Season 2, The Gang Runs for Office
Dee: [well-nigh the trip the light fantastic toe 'contest'] Location: Paddy'southward Bar. Time: Sat. Date: With Charlie Kelly. Prize: Paddy's Pub?!
Dennis: Whoa, expect a minute, yous put the bar up as a prize?
Charlie: No, checking out, I put the bar under the 'Pride' section, the things in the 'Pride' section...
Dee: It'due south a 'Z', Charlie! Prize!
Frank: Didn't you read that goddamn thing?
Charlie: I gave it a once-over!
Mac: Your illiteracy has screwed united states of america once more, Charlie!
Season Three, The Gang Dances Their Asses Off
Charlie: Oh, shit. Look at that door, dude. You meet that door right there, the one marked "Pirate"? You lot think a pirate lives in there?
Dennis: I see a door marked "Individual". Is that the door you lot're talking nigh?
Season Iii, The Gang Solves the North korea Situation
Charlie: I see what you're saying. I could go for some woods.
Mac: Uh, no, we're saying 'wooed'.
Charlie: Yeah, cool. We'll go some forest, nosotros'll build something absurd, and then nosotros'll go get the money.
Dennis: That doesn't have anything to do with what we're talking about, Charlie. We're talking well-nigh being wooed past this corporate guy...
Charlie: How are you going to exist woods?
Season Iii, The Gang Sells Out
Dennis: (referring to his memoir) Charlie, what the hell were you doing with it?
Dee: Well, uh, since he can't read, I'yard guessing he was masturbating to your pictures.
Flavor Four, Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life
(Charlie is explaining what he does at the bar)
Charlie: Lastly, before I open up the bar in the morning time, I always make sure to turn on the "Coors" sign, let people know nosotros got water ice delicious Coors in the bar, y'all know, and then that'due south the last matter I practise. Ol' Charlie's done a lot of piece of work around here.
Dennis: Charlie, that sign does non say "Coors."
Charlie: Eh?
Dennis: (very annoyed) Come up outside, come outside.
Mac: (even more annoyed) Goddammit!
(They go exterior and see that the sign now says "BAR Closed")
Dennis: Airtight! Information technology says "Closed", Charlie!
Charlie: Oh yeah. All correct. I tin see that at present, just yous can't really read it from the within...
Mac: You tin can't read it from the outside!
Season Five, The Great Recession
Appearances[]
Flavor Ii: The Gang Gives Dorsum, The Gang Runs for Office
Season Three: The Gang Finds a Dumpster Infant, The Gang Gets Held Earnest, The Gang Solves the Democratic people's republic of korea State of affairs, The Gang Sells Out, The Gang Dances Their Asses Off
Flavour Four: The Gang Solves the Gas Crunch, Bums: Making a Mess All Over the Urban center, The Nightman Cometh
Season 5: The Great Recession, Paddy's Pub: Domicile of the Original Kitten Mittens
Season Six: Mac's Large Interruption, Charlie Kelly: Male monarch of the Rats
Season Seven: Chardee MacDennis: The Game of Games
Flavor Eight: Pop-Popular: The Final Solution, Charlie and Dee Find Beloved, Charlie's Mom Has Cancer, Frank's Back in Business
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